When I googled “The Power of Association”, I received 2 020 000 000 results in 0,41 seconds. This simply adds weight to the vast interest that this topic has. Most of those search results speak to how, by osmosis, one becomes the sum of the five or so people one hangs out with. We are taught that good relations motivate and inspire us towards fruitful views, productive activities and fruitful skills to advance our standards of knowledge and expertise. Most of the search results I came across have an external focus, mainly centering on how the people and circles we relate to influence us. I would like to take a different approach though. How many of us ask ourselves how much value WE actually add to our circles? Just how much value can we reap from our allies and associates by actually adding value to them ourselves?

While asking myself these questions, I thought of the foremost example of this concept from the bible.  To provide some context, God made similar promises to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, and they all had the same faith. Jacob was no stranger to clashes, and he was driven by a desire to obtain what he wanted for himself. Unlike his grandfather Abraham, Jacob used his cunning and deception to gain an advantage. Abraham's work was inseparably linked to his sense of purpose, which stemmed from his relationship with God. To some extent, Jacob was ignorant of this. His first notable act of self-serving behaviour was when he tricked a hungry Esau into selling him his birthright (Genesis 25:29-34). His second was when, with the help of his mother Rebekah, he deceived his blind father into giving him the blessing meant for his brother Esau (Genesis 27:1–30.) True, it was always God's intention for Jacob to succeed Isaac, but he chose to take matters into his own hands and rise the ranks by relying on his wits. This is an example of getting the proper result while employing the wrong methods. The animosity caused within the family due to these “wrong means” led Jacob to flee to his mother’s brother, Laban. This is where the other power of association is fully realised.

Jacob toiled for 20 exasperating years on Laban's farm, during which time he amassed his fortune. Even though Laban had broken many of his promises to him, Jacob was successful in marrying Leah and Rachel further than his vast wealth. Jacob wanted to go home, but Laban persuaded him to stay and work for him, promising him the ability to "…name his wages…" (Genesis 30 Vs 28). Clearly, Jacob had been a hard worker and Laban had reaped the benefits of his association with Jacob. So apart from the skulduggery that occurred between them, they both benefited from their two decades together. Jacob mastered the art of livestock breeding in addition to the shelter and protection he received from living under Laban's roof. Due to Jacob’s blessing and skill as a worker, Laban’s stock and wealth were greatly enlarged. The relationship was mutually beneficial.

Apart from the adverse health and economic impact, COVID-19 introduced us to a whole new vocabulary. Now we know of things such as Flattening the curve, Essential needs, Quarantine, Asymptomatic, Isolation and Social Distancing. The latter for the longest time robbed us of our usual gatherings and meetings. Even after the lockdown restrictions were relaxed, meetings are now taken online with apps such as Zoom, Skype, Microsoft Teams and Google Meet becoming the norm. We are now in the era of “self”, looking out for you and yours. When normalcy returned, well the version of normalcy that emerged from the ashes, we were then able to get together again with our acquaintances once again. But even today, instead of asking just how much value your associations provide to you, very few ask themselves the potent question,“How much value do I add?”. Do you add ambience and life to your surroundings or are you there to selfishly leach the light out of them for self-enrichment?

Though motivational speaker Jim Rohn’s quote “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” may be true it does not fully appreciate the gravity of association from a spiritual point of view. God’s covenantal blessings are gifts to be received, not grabbed. They bear the responsibility of ensuring that they are used for the benefit of others rather than being hoarded. Like Jacob who wrestled the mysterious man in whom he “…saw God face to face…” (Gen. 32:24, 30), let us wrestle for God's blessing in faith and be transformed by grace, not for ourselves but for the enrichment of those around us. I take nothing away from the argument that there is a great deal of wealth in the “Right” associations. However as much as they upgrade and develop us, the relationship must be symbiotic.

I pose a challenge to you now dear reader, to take it a step further. Next time you find yourself in a room where you are the smartest person, do not leave to find another one. Seek ways to add value and upgrade the room before you leave it. Instead of leaning on our wit and understanding, let us rely on God’s wisdom to upgrade one and all. Not that I’m saying you must suffer mediocrity and negativity in that endeavour, but a positive attitude and teachable spirit are vital for both sides of the equation.